Recovery comes with acceptance, right? Well, here it goes. Hi, my name is Debbie and I have a jealous heart. Yes, the green eyed monster has wrapped his (he must be a him) arms around my heart and filled it with pure, unadulterated jealousy.
I am deeply envious of glardeners. Yes, I said glardener. Ok, I coined this phrase myself but they really do exist. I have seen them up close and personal and they’re a unique breed, almost like a species all to themselves. A glardener is a glamorous gardener. Maybe you’ve seen one gliding through a garden near you? They are those perfectly coiffed people who never have a hair out of place under their wide brimmed, straw sun hat. Not even one tiny drop of dew on their sun protected skin while planting an entire organic vegetable garden in the 90 degree midday sun. Where do these people come from anyway?
I can assure you I am not a glardener, on my best day I am barely a gardener. When I am outside in 90 degree sun for longer than 10 minutes I melt faster than the wicked witch from the Wizard of Oz, and it’s not a pretty sight. There is no part of me that resembles anything glamorous after a stint in the yard. I am absolutely intrigued by true glardeners. I don’t know how they are able to maintain such amazing physical composure while the sun is sucking every ounce of moisture and life from their body.
Today, I salute the true glardeners of the world. I can only hope that one day I can be just like you.